Posts Tagged ‘matrimony’

Early this morning, say between 1-3AM for no apparent reason, ok maybe prolonged boredom! I found myself typing the address of a matrimonial site in the address bar. I always wanted to visit that site someday, thanks to the well planned marketing strategies adopted by such sites wherein they post potentially Miss Universe winning photographs of women in eye catching adverts on websites that I happen to visit. It was only after the page loaded that I realized the numbness in my brain with which I was staring at the page wondering what next? Unsure of what to do, I thought let’s register and see some nice matches. But so numb had I become that I couldn’t even locate the ‘Register Free’ button located bang in the middle surrounded in bridal red color. I had to ask a friend on chat to help me find it and graciously so, he did. As I moved my finger’s on the Mac’s trackpad at 2cm/s towards that button which has been known to change the lives of thousands of Indians, half my brain screamed “Watch it !!! ” while the other half begged,”Go on! Do it !”. The latter half won.

And there I was, entering information that could some day change my life if I ever needed to use that service (though once I believed I’d never have to), it was fun to me but only until I reached the 3rd page or so, I decided to call it quits. No registering, just window shop for now! After a few cancels & backs i found myself back to the first page, but this time entering match-winning criteria for a bride!
Some more pages, photos and info blah blah blah… lets quickly check out the match finding algorithm results my brain said. And there were a few. Thankfully my friend online too, I assume got infected with the window-shopping bug & for the next hour or so, we were exchanging profile id’s of some ok-kind ones with the exception of a few better-than-ok ones. If you ever need a laugh and have exhausted all the joke portals online, just head to any such matrimonial site and just glance at the ‘about-me’ or ‘personality’ reads. There’s some serious talent in there when it comes to packaging ones self into those lucrative 2days, 3 nights tour kind of offers that promise to take entertainment & satisfaction to the max.
One such profile was of a stuffed freida pinto lookalike with an amazing first liner in the info. It drove me nuts! Not because of what she looked like or didn’t look like but because of what she had written in the bio, check it out:

UNDERSTANDING CAN TAKE RYT N RONG DECISION

I was stunned. So stunned that both halves of my brain went what the fish !!
LMAO ! Seriously girl, if I’m gonna (hopefully not have to) marry you, you’re NOT taking any decisions ! 😀
That one line, all caps, so emphatic & captivating, devoid of any punctuation had me laughing my guts off for a good 10 minutes. Thank you for that, but I wouldn’t want to marry you because you’re NOT UNDERSTANDING what a matrimonial site’s supposed to get you. And there, you have lost one (of the most eligible) bachelor’s in the country. Thanks for the laughter though, if I ever meet you somewhere, I’ll thank you in person.
Unfortunately amidst all of the fun, my cellphone buzzed with a message thanking me for having registered on that site. Apparently, it so happened, that in my numbness, the first 2 pages or so of my info was enough to get registered and now I sit with an account on a matrimonial site, way before I intend to marry (if ever I do), feeling stupid and thinking, what was I thinking !
On the good side, i’ll just use the login to window-shop and laugh at the amusement such prospects provide. 😀 😀

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